ramblings

Do 2 people in a committed long term relationship stay together cos they
a) love each other very very much
b) think they have a future together
c) are used to having each other in their respective lives?

when friends pour out their stories to me and i assume the aunt agony role, it seems to me that whilst a) is the right answer ie: the one that gives you 1 point in the module 'how to be a great lover 101', most people think that is not the sole reason for being stuck to each other. love is known to be right, idealistic and very perfectionist.

except when option b) becomes a part of the reason to be together. is having a common goal for the future essential? whatever happened to negiotation and compromise? i thought love is supposed to bring you to places you'd never thought you will be if you stayed single. love is supposed to nurture and transform you, and make some room in your heart for another being.

c) is a product of being together for too long or just an excuse people use to stay together? routine is great, i'd admit to that. but unless you are implying without the other person u cannot live... routine is a shocking reason to be together. if u do not love the person wholeheartedly, keeping the person by your side simply because you are too selfish to let go of habit and routine is a pretty weak argument.

i dunno what i think anymore.
should it be a combination of factors to sustain a relationship?
what about stuff like respect, honesty, trust... etc etc etc
or is love supposed to be enough to last us?


Someone wrote the following about love -

I want it to be inconvenient, I want to sacrifice my life for it.
I want the kind of love that wakes me up at 3am.
I want love that hurts, love that I have to work for.
I want love that tests me.
I want the kind of love that is hard to find, and hard to keep and never easy.
I want the kind of love where you get hurt.
I want love that makes me cry.
I want to hold on to it even if it takes me through my worst nightmare.
But most of all I want love that is worth it!!


maybe worthiness is the answer?